*** This location of Quaker Steak and Lube has closed
I'm not quite sure what to make of the "eating for sport" kinda thing…… I used to be able to put it away when I was younger (on a wager, I once finished Beth's Cafe challenge). But it's been decades since I've even given though to doing anything close to what I did during my youth. Now it seems a bit silly, something that was great during my college days, but a recent spate of shows like "Man vs Food" have made such gastronomic excess/stress popular. For instance, when an acquaintance of mine found out I was going to Madison, he quickly told me, "hey, there's a Quaker Steak and Lube in Madison." To which I replied, "what…. a gas station?" He quickly explained that it was Quaker S-T-E-A-K, a chain which featured his favorite wings back in Ohio. So far, Quaker Steak hasn't made it West of Colorado, so there were no shops on the West Coast. Knowing how I enjoy chicken wings he soon got my undivided attention. As a kicker he threw in something called the "Atomic Wing Challenge"…… I explained that while I enjoy spicy food, I enjoyed varied nuances with regards to heat, not just the sensation of having skin burnt off my body. I recently sampled a ghost pepper, and decided that it was like a bad neighbor, any contact is painful and is something you'd like to avoid as much as possible. Even worse was some Naked Shrimp from the Original Sab E Lee with MrC and friends. MrC is Lao, and ordered it "Lao spicy"…… man that was tough. By the end of the meal, I had a ring of first degree burns around my mouth. Luckily for me, even though sweat pours down my face, I've never had problems with my stomach.
So I declined…. which led to a bit of heckling, during which I was called something that rhymes with "fussy". Even though giving in to my inner-machismo has often had terrible results, I decided to go with the Atomic Wing Challenge, after all….. it really seems like the dude on "Man vs Food" is doing a bit of (very bad) over-acting at times. 150,000 Scoville Units? That's just a mild Habanero……
Instead of the Madison location, I went to the Middleton location, just outside of Madison, and closer to where I was staying.
As you can figure by the name, the restaurant is Gas-station themed…. with a sportsbar-meets-corporate chain restaurant type of atmosphere (think Jiffylube crossed with TGI Friday's). The folks here were indicative of the service I received in Madison, friendly, laid-back, but efficient.
Having a seat and perusing the menu, I found what I was looking for.
So there it was…… until I read the top of the menu….
Now I had read up a bit on the Quaker State Atomic sauce….. rumor had it, that the restaurant Atomic Sauce sauce was made by the folks who make Endorphin Rush Hot Sauce, and the bottled Quaker State Brand Atomic Sauce was basically cayenne and tabasco. But here was something supposedly clocking in at 500,000 Scoville Units, which is about a 100 times hotter than a Jalapeno. So why not???
When I ordered the wings, the nice young lady asked me if I wanted a blindfold and a cigarette…. just kidding…. I was asked if I wanted to do "the triple atomic wing challenge". When I asked her what I got by doing the challenge, I was told I'd get my photo on the wall and a bumper sticker….. nah, not for me. I'd just settle for my six triple atomic wings without the fanfare. And I really could have done without the flashing police light they put on my table….
And of course a "waiver" confirming that I'm a total knucklehead is all part of the show…..
I'm sure that when my Server went to place my order of wings, someone pointed out that I look like a classic sufferer of Hyperhidrosis, and was given a good amount of extra napkins……
Since the wings at Quaker Steak come six to an order, I decided to try something else just to see how the wings are. The young lady told me that the Arizona Ranch Wings were her favorite.
These wings are not battered, but were decently fried, the skin was fairly crisp. The sauce was fairly mild, not too spicy (supposedly, 2,050 Scoville Units), and did have a mild buttermilk-ranch flavor that edged on onion soup base. Nothing really that special though…..
Of course I know that you really don't care about those wings, you really want to see what Triple Atomic Wings look like, right? Well here it is, in all of it's anti-climatic glory…..
These were hot…. or maybe I should type Hot…. but were definitely not HOT, if you know what I mean. The capsicum smell was pretty strong, and the heat was in your face, and sweat was dripping down my face, but no hallucinations, not even the usual tingling scalp that occurs when I eat something super-spicy. The heat was tempered with a bit of sweetness, and the oil content, which usually just plain kills you by keeping the heat applied to your tongue, lips, and everything else that it comes in contact with, was relatively low. I recently had a couple of drops of Mad Dog's Revenge Habanero Extract, which clocked in at 1,000,000 Scoville Units, and actually made two of my FOYs (Friends of Yoso) MrQ and PeterL jump out of their seat and run out to the parking lot. This was nowhere near that. As a wing, it was hot, totally in your face, and not something I'd order again.
The wings at Quaker Steak are decent, better then most chains, and I'd probably drop by and have them again if one was in the area. It's nothing I'm going to crave though. I did text TammyC and told her that MrC would eat this stuff like it was candy……
One of the manager's came and spoke with me after I ate my wings…. she was very friendly, and funny. She told me that the Triple Atomic Wing sauce was made with Ghost Peppers….. funny it didn't seem as hot as the Ghost Peppers I've had.
Quaker Steak and Lube
2259 Deming Way
Middleton, WI 53562
Some really nice folks I met once told me that Adam Richmond is a basically an actor, earning a Master's Degree in drama from Yale. And though I've never seen the episode, I can't believe he had any problem with the Quaker Steak Atomic Wing Challenge. If he was, he must have been making good use of his drama degree.
Maybe he'll try this out next time…..